Always Love

I have been doing a lot of thinking over the past few weeks and this will be my attempt to put it into words.  We will see how it goes and I apologize in advance if it is all over the place and not pleasant to read.  Try and stick with me.
So I am winding down with winter quarter and about to enter into my last spring quarter of my undergrad.  This fact has been tripping me up a little.  This wouldn't normally freak me out if I was doing what I usually do and have a firm plan of what comes next.  A lot of you may be thinking that I am being a little dramatic and that I still have one whole year to figure all of this out.  My answer to this is that I am very aware that I have a year left but I also know how fast a year goes by.  I know that it goes by with a blink of an eye.
What is my fear, you ask?  Well my fear is that I will get it wrong.  The thing is that I do not know what I want to do 'when I grow up'.  When I decided to major in Psychology, my thought was that I would be a counselor.  Don't get me wrong, this still is something I want to do...along with many many other things.  The nice thing(and right now, the hard thing) about getting a BA in Psychology is that you can choose anything you want to do!  Other things which I have thought about is being a teacher(going into the school system, though, is not ideal and a big turnoff), school counseling, Child Development, Medical family therapy, Per marital counseling and many other things.  What do you pick when everything sounds like something you want to do?
A big thing is whatever I end up doing with my life, I want it to matter.  I think I have heard this statement many times and never given it more thought than, "of coarse you want your career to matter".  Well these past weeks I have really felt what people mean when they say that.  I want my life, my time, my energy, my passions to matter to someone.  I want to be able to change the lives of those I am around.  When I say this, I do not only mean those whom I am working with.  I want to truly change the people around me.  My friends, my family, if God graces me with a husband and children; I want the lives of these people be changed for the better for the sole reason that I was there and I loved them.  I feel as though I have recently forgot the idea to love people.  It seems so simple yet it is one out of the two most important commands in the bible.  We are to love God with all our heart and love our neighbor as ourselves.  That is what I want to do with my life.  I want to matter to the people I come in contact with and I want to be a life changer for them.  What this looks like, I do not know yet.
I want to have a home where people are loved and this is not questioned.  I want to have friends who know that they can call me when they are lonely(oh the emptiness of loneliness is such a horrid feeling).  I want to have family who sees my appreciation for them and sees my love for them on a daily basis.  I want to have a husband who is served without having to ask and who hears the word LOVE often.  I want to have kids who knows the sweetness of a mothers love and the warmth of a hug.  I think that in my life, if I am able to love the people around me and the people who I come into contact with, I will have mattered in this life.
I am reminded of a song that I have been playing a lot lately(thanks to the newly discovered SPOTIFY).  The song is called Always Love by Nada Surf.
"Always love, hate will get you every time.  Always love, don't wait 'till the finish line."

Thank You for reading this post.  It is very important to me!

Back in Seattle; Surprise!!

I know I haven't posted anything for a while but here I am!  I have been so busy with my crazy and unpredictable life.  So, I am back in Seattle after the summer months of thinking I was going to stay in California.  The transition has been difficult but also very good for me.  I am very close with my family and even though it is my junior year, I still have trouble with wanting to be home sometimes.  School is going good.  I am officially living in a house where I pay rent and utilities.  This is a first for me!  The past two years I lived in the dorms and I just paid it all to the school.  My landlord is actually a professor at my school and she is so sweet and there for us when we need anything.  I am living off campus but I am only a four minute walk away which is really nice.  I also have a job on campus.  I work at one of the coffee shops on campus.  I had a hard time when I first started because I didn't know how to work the register and didn't know where anything was.  The person who I had to ask questions to was not helpful and a bit rude so I felt lost.  Now that I know everything it is really fun!  I work at 645 in the morning which I really like because I get off but then have all day for class and studying.  This year is super busy also.  Pretty much when i am not in class or working, I am studying.  It has been good so far and I have been blessed in countless ways since the first day I got here.
A theme that is my focus for me this year is growth.  I have realized that I put too much pressure on myself to be at the finish line before running or even training for the race.  I have been trying to see and be intentional about making small steps of progress each day.  There is no need to wish I was somewhere else or in the future because then I miss out on what is happening right now.  I am blessed where I am at:  Seattle, in College, and currently sitting gin the Student Union Building drinking a delicious pumpkin spice latte and eating a bagel with pumpkin cream cheese.  I promise to update more often!  I haven't forgotten about you all!

Fall Time is my favorite time!

Accept, Respect, Love the Body you Have

Fabulous Reminder!!!
I am making the commitment beginning right now...  Accepting and loving the body I have  :)
Accept, Respect, Love the Body You Have

Needed Changes

Since starting my job, I have failed to continue with some other important things this summer.  This includes reading, keeping my room and things organized, journaling and spending time with God.  Because I have been really tired when I come home from work, all I am motivated to do it sit on the couch and watch TV.  Friday was a little different.  I was rushed when I came home from work because I had a skype date with a friend from Seattle.  Then I went to the gym for just a little bit.  After that I came home and watched TV because I was very exhausted.
I have noticed a lot thought that the more I watch TV, the more exhausted I am.  I want to try and go to bed early(around 10pm), wake up around 6am and be productive with my days.  I really need to get back into reading and baking and doing other important things rather than wasting time watching TV.  Exercise is a whole other story.  I get unmotivated to exercise the more I am out of shape.  Now that I am pretty out of shape, I need to make my self go to the gym and run because the more I go and do it, the more I enjoy it.  I am really enjoying working at the coffee house!  Because that gives me a little structure in my days, I need to focus on creating structure for the rest of my time.
I am still in the beginnings of reading 2 books, Spoken From the Heart and Beautiful Things Happen When a Woman Trusts God.  After I finish with these two books, I want to begin reading youth novels and kid's books to prepare for teaching.  I want to begin building my library for when I teach in the next few years!
Lots of things to reshape in my life but they will all improve me as a person which I want!
God Bless and Thank You for Reading!!!

It's A Grind Coffee House

I have been working at It's A Grind for 4 days now and LOVE it!!!  It is a coffee shop, where I belong  :)

I will post more about my first few days later.  I have been so busy!

Experiencing Summer Goodness

So I know it has been a while but I have been enjoying summer so much!  I have been catching up with old friends as well as making new friends.  I have also been applying for lots of jobs, reading lots of books, and doing a lot of thinking about what my future has for me.  I have been thinking a lot about transferring schools.  SPU is getting very expensive and I am just such a California girl I am pretty sure I don't want to go back to Washington.  I have also been contemplating on changing my major.  I may switch from Psychology to Elementary Ed.  I have wanted to be a teacher for as long as I can remember.  Then, when I took a psychology class senior year of high school, I loved it and decided to do that!  Now, I am questioning if that is what I want to do with my life.  I would still keep a minor in Psych but be a teacher.  It sounds so great to me!  We shall see.  I hopefully will be taking fall semester off due to transferring so then I will be able to spend some time in a classroom and really be able to observe.  Lots of things going on!

This morning I went to the bike trail and rode my mountain bike 20 miles!  It was a lot of fun and the weather was perfect.  I also got a new book to read!  I finished The Case for Christ.  This book was very good.  It gives you a lot of information and the proof of Jesus' existence on earth.  I just got Spoken from the Heart which is the Biography of Laura Bush. I started it last night and just the first chapter had me hooked.  I love reading about people lives and the things they have accomplished as well as their struggles.  I am very excited to continue.  I just love summer and California so much.  It is hard to imagine returning to Washington for any long period of time.  

I also wanted to share with you a recipe I made last night for dinner.  It is from Runners World Magazine and it turned out very delicious.

Pasta Bean Toss

1 pound whole-grain penne

2 medium red onions, thinly sliced

2 large garlic cloves

1 teaspoon olive oil

5 carrots, cut into slices

2 cups raw broccoli

12 ripe plum tomatoes, diced

3 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce

4 tablespoons fresh basil, chopped

1 can red kidney beans

1 can white kidney beans

1/2 grated parmesan cheese

Cook pasta according to package.  While pasta is cooking, saute in a large frying pan onions and garlic in oil until tender.  Add remaining vegetables, tomatoes, Worcestershire sauce, and basil.  Simmer for 4 minutes.  Add beans and simmer for another 2 minutes.  Add pasta and cheese and toss.  

Working Woman

As many of you know, I am now a working woman.  I am still a student but now I am student with a job.  I work for my school's catering company which has actually been a very fun job!  I work random hours throughout the day but am given lots of time for studying, sleeping and class.  That is the nice thing about working on campus.  Along with that, I am also learning a lot about hosting events, the proper way of setting and designing a table and so on.  This is my fourth week on the job and I just got paid.  Now I have not worked a paying job since the summer between my sophomore and junior year of high school.  During that time, my parents still provided me with money for the things I needed, I had a car and I didn't have anything I was saving up for.  So, stupidly, I spent my money on things I didn't need.  Now, my parents still provide me with money for food and the essentials(just for this year but come next year, I will be paying for all of that), but knowing how hard I worked for my money, I put it straight into my savings.  Now part of the reason is because I am saving up for an iphone which I will buy when I get home for summer(22 more days!) but the fact that I have worked for my money, spending it on things such as clothes or going out to dinner doesn't seem as though it is worth it.  I am very happy that my attitude toward money has changed and a lot of it is probably due to that summer when I spent it all and how at the end of the summer I felt like it was not worth it.
I am now in the process of applying to a few summer jobs as well as volunteer positions.  I am praying that I will get one and that way I will have money with I will be saving up for next year in college where I will be living in a house off campus!!  I will have more bills than I expected but if I learn how to manage my money well, it should be no problem.